When he asked if we could try the hug/compliment strategy, W said yes she would try it, and I said NO because.... Although W says she has NC with OM, she has plans to be in his territory in a few weeks and "can't promise she won't run into him." I'm not ready to return to ground zero and at this point, a 2nd A or continuation may be the end of the line for me. I also told MC and W that I have enough dignity and self respect that I won't tolerate a continued affair and pretend that we are both working on the R when W hasn't committed.
Good job, UpperCu -- I know that wasn't easy, but you handled it like a champ.
Your wife is now likely going to swing all over the map, from super-nice to full-on-spew to everything in-between, as she tries to test your resolve. Just stay calm, remind her that this isn't what you wanted, but you've "heard" her that she doesn't want to be married to you and you're setting her free. Be sure to do GAL and remain lovingly detached, and come here frequently for help and guidance.
She's also going to probably trying to probe you for what you're thinking, what you've decided. Just say "I have a lot of thinking to do, and am looking at all of our options right now. This isn't what I wanted, but I also realize I'll be okay." Don't tip your hand.
