Thank you to everyone for their feedback and input. I was out all day with my kids and also did spend a few hours with my W in the morning yesterday. Per usual, we had fun.

I know my W is confused. She has said this to me a few times. (I don't know how I feel") What seems to be working is showing her my good side, my fun side, etc. The only reason that I keep coming back to the "the A has to end mindset" is I know that her A will keep her from having any romantic feelings for me. And as long as she lacks these feelings, my guess is she will not want to come back to our M. She alluded to this before when she said "what do people do, just stay in an unhappy marriage for their kids."

I also agree with CaliGuy that she needs to come to this decision on her own. I cannot force or control it.

What I do is the question of the day (or year!)?

Me: 40, W: 40
M: 15, T: 18
D - 10, S - 7
D announcement 6/7/2014
A discovered 7/20/2014 (but denied by W)
Still living together and sharing same bed