Inside My chrysalis 5

[Card29]

ganb8te, I could see your IC's point of view that it may depend on quantity. But it is such a slippery slope. Even if we did have hard data on "how much is too much", why would a best-intentioned H, who is aware of the damaging effects, cool-headedly decide to step foot on the slope at all? I say "cool-headedly" because we make terrible decisions when we are "under the influence" of porn. Here is an example of me slipping down the slope, which has happened many times in the past:

- I'm doing it once a month, that's not bad.
- I'm already doing it once a month, so twice a month isn't that different.
- What's the difference between every other week and every week? Not much!
- Okay, I've already done it once this week, but it's not like one more time this week will make a difference.

It's either that, or I break a porn-free streak once and then see no reason not to do it everyday.

The IC is right - we have no data to show exactly how much is harmful in any given relationship. But we DO know that M harms intimacy when used in excess (whatever "excess" is). So the most foolproof solution is to stop. Not saying it's easy to stop, but it's the best path to choose. Trying to determine how much porn is okay for a porn addict is like an alcoholic deciding how many drinks is too much.

There is nothing progressive about porn, if your goal is intimacy. It has no good place in the vast majority of M's. JMO, though.