Depressed WAW, digging in, learning about myself

[CMS]

CMS, you have a good perspective. For a while I was kicking myself for not seeing what I see now, but:

A.) the past is the past. No changing it
B.) I was never going to see it until something traumatic happened to force me to see clearly
C.) Worst-case scenario would be going through this and not changing anything about myself. Either I would end up in the same position in another M or repeat history in this M if WAW comes back. One time is painful enough, thank you

I completely agree. It may be easier said then done but it is the path to take for a better future. I at first wasn't sure why I should even have posted on here but now I am glad I did.