"Jefe..I constantly find myself thinking about everything they have done and said and what if I would have just not said anything to my H about all the calls they were making to each other...maybe we would still be together?"
I often wish I had never picked up the phone and looked, then she wouldn't have left, or would she have? We both stood up for what was right. God would not have allowed us to have the knowledge and not do anything about it for long. Our marriages were already lost we just didn't know it yet. Don't blame yourself you didn't do this. We can talk about our "contributions" to the downfall at another opportunity.
"The only thing I have found that really takes my mind off them is spending time with my son, but he will be spending every other week with my H starting today. What have you found if anything that helps take your mind off everything?"
I wish I had the answers here. I still suffer too. I can say this, please find yourself something to do on the weeks the kiddo is with H. Maybe something new you've always wanted to do, or a Zumba class, or something that makes you feel pretty, anything but sitting in the house alone with your thoughts and tears.
"I want to ask my H so bad why he acts like I should just be accepting of this situation, and should I just pretend that its normal to see that my family of 16 yrs have just welcomed this HW without any question? My stomach is constantly turning and I find myself crying over the stupidest things!"
He's in a self-will fueled fog. He would't/couldn't answer you if you tried. This is just the territory for the LBS. The crying is normal. I still breakdown almost daily. But it gets better, I promise.
"So I guess there is an upside to this whole thing..I have lost almost 30 lbs since this whole ordeal started. I hope the knife twisting will eventually end for the both of us and anybody else going through the same sitch!"
Seems to be another LBS trait, the awesome sleep depraved, stress induced weight loss. I'm down at least 30 pounds myself. Eat healthy (healthier at least) and don't focus on it too much. I would just love to get a full 8 hours sleep in one 24hr period instead of the 8 hours I get spread over 3 days. This to ebbs and flows but in an upward fashion. It get better. Stay strong!
PS, what is HW? I know you're referring to the other woman but what exactly is it?
Me 47 - W 35 M 9 - T 10 2 Daughters - 7 & 9 Discovery of EA- 8/4/14 S - 8/5/15 D mentioned - 9/11/14 R & Piecing - 3/17/15 Regard one another as more important than yourselves. - Philippians 2:3
