Need help. Scared, confused pt 2

[Jefe]

Man, I think I just set us back several steps.
We just had a horrible phone conversation. I did not keep a good PMA or anything. I think I just blew it completely.

Man my heart hurts.


I got these 2 text messages after our final phone covo this morning:

"We are not together anymore and will not be anymore. I will that the girls where I choose when I want. The same goes for you. I will not be asking or telling you about where I take them. They will always be safe with me. Just because you don't like someone doesn't mean they can't be around them."

"We will get a divorce ASAP just saying so please stop trying to win me over. I don't want your opinions on anything."

I was trying to set boundaries on some things and she exploded. We have yet to even discuss the issue that got us here and today when it was mentioned she now denies that it ever happened. This guy this happened with has a shack up girlfriend that just had his third child Sept 2nd. I want to call her and let her know so badly what is going on but I know in my heart it would only cause mega problems. On top of that, this morning she blamed the entire ordeal on me. If i had just been different none of this would have happened. She wouldn't have done what she did. (I drove her to do it, basically.) I know intellectually this is stupid, but it still cuts deep.

Really freaked out now. I know that I am supposed to detach and move forward as if I am moving ahead with my life anyway and I know as long as fear grips me I have already lost but this is not where I wanted to be. I have been lying awake all night last night thinking about this guy and what happened and how long it has been going on. Did not help my situation at all this morning.