"You guys are so right but i just dont do it.. i dont know why.. im idiot.."

1Wish. It seems to me you are afraid. Face up to it. You do need to go to a counsellor.

As your are in the UK, you can go to your GP and ask. You can even self refer.

Did you see or read the news recently about the government's attitudes towards mental health and its commitment to providing services? It was a LibDem minister who announced it. One of the few things this gov has done right.

You can also got to its good to talk and find a local counsellor. Read that site.

Choose one who does solution based/focused brief therapy. You can do it over the phone or via skype too. You won't even have to leave home.

Just do it though.

M: 57 / EW: 52
T: 21, M: 8
S: 18, S: 15
Bomb: 1 Jun 14
EA Aug 2014 I think
PA Feb 2015 possibly sooner