"- when I pull back, she definitely reacts and gets nicer and tried to cozy up to me, but I think it is because she is afraid of losing me, not because she wants me necessarily"

Who cares? None of us feel loving towards our spouses 24/7. Don't worry about the why's and learn to enjoy the moment. Besides, I thought the idea was to make her afraid of loosing you. It's working.
You are way too much like me and over analyze the crap out of everything. It always ends up being my undoing.

Me 47 - W 35
M 9 - T 10
2 Daughters - 7 & 9
Discovery of EA- 8/4/14
S - 8/5/15
D mentioned - 9/11/14
R & Piecing - 3/17/15
Regard one another as more important than yourselves.
- Philippians 2:3