In limbo, need to figure out next steps (thread #5

[shodan]

Where I struggle is on the "time" issue. I know that I should be patient. Based on my wife's actions and words, I know she is struggling with her decision on what to do. I know that is why she wants time. My moving towards divorce is putting pressure on her, which may or may not be a good thing. But how can she make a clear choice if the OM is in the picture?

Like a lot of people on this forum, I wish she would read a book or two about people having affairs, their feelings and how to get past them. Of course, I know I cannot send these to her and I know she will not read them anyway.