Do I start 180 at this point?

[25yearsmlc]

[quote=twb66]I think I have already violated most of the 37 rules. I did everything wrong. So I need to know if I should continue what I've been doing or get started on the 37 rules.

To be clear, are you asking if you should do what you know is NOT working

VERSUS doing something new & different?

Gee, I'll throw out my answer without even reading another.

Okay, Do NOT do what you know has failed. Doing what isn't helpful, is part of why you are here.

and YES You Should do what IS working (or is at least different from what is failing...

The answer is DON'T DO WHAT DOES NOT WORK

and DO WHAT HELPS.

IF you are doing what has not helped, and might have even harmed your relationship --why would you consider continuing that? So, NO, don't keep doing it.

The 180s are always to be done. That's b/c

you are always trying NOT to fuel the reasons your spouse has for wanting out,

so it's always in your interests to counter their negative views of you, w/Positives, which are those 180s...

We want your WAS to Reconsider their decision...so confusing them with your new behavior, undermining their negative views of you, is a GOOD thing. Do you see why?

So is the answer to your question more obvious to you now?

Okay I hope you've ordered the DB book(s) and that you Will read them asap.

Meanwhile I'll read your other posts os This thread, further, so I can better advise later...