Ok, you're all right (and never harsh Georgiabelle). Bar stools mean nothing significant.
I don't want to live in 6 month increments. I need to figure that out. It's not like M or the possibility of R is insignificant enough to just set aside like it's deciding if I should have chicken or shrimp for dinner. It's such a big thing that it's hard not to hope and plan for the future with hope and search through every tiny little hint and tweak it to support my cause.
Reality though is the NOW and the NOW is that I'm enjoying a nice glass of viognier. D is enjoying a purple bath (colored bath tabs make baths much more fun!) while reading and the 4 HUGE brown and black widow spiders I found in the backyard are now dead. All is good right now.
One breath at a time. Stop living in the future. Ok. I have new mottoes. Thank you.
I really want to thank you all for coming to my side when I really need you (or just pretty much always). People IRL ("in real life") get sick of talking about my sitch (and so do I) but you guys get it. I appreciate that so much.
I need to stop fixating and complaining. I have it pretty good considering. I'm going to focus on that for a while.
p.s. it's GREAT taking time to read a book NOT about repairing relationships. I'm reading The Lavender Ribbon and strangely the main character has my name. It's an unusual name and yet it's spelled the same way that I spell it which is also unusual. Strange. Strange but awesome.
