In limbo, need to figure out next steps (thread #5

[shodan]

My W just called me. I had sent her a few emails on Mediation with notes from various people with whom I had spoken. I also sent her an email with potential times to meet with someone this week. She called me on her way home rather than email back.

I explained the differences between mediation, collaborative D and litigation. After some questions, she then said "this is a very big decision, I just need some time to think." I told her that unfortunately that while I do not want a D, this is my only option because I refuse to share my W with someone else. I also said that if she wants time, we can take all of the time in the world to work on our M, but only when I know she is committed to our M and it involves only the two of us. I told her our M will take work to repair, but we cannot start it until she is completely honest with me and she cuts off all ties with him.

I was very nice in my tone and left the convo with "you have two options. if you want to pursue this other life, I cannot control you and your decision. I will make it easy for you and we can divorce. Or, you choose to come home to the kids and me and to work on our M. But, if you choose the kids and me, you will forever close the door on that other part of your life forever and have no contact with him ever again. Since right now you say you cannot decide, then I have no option but to pursue a D."

man, this s&cks.