Wife Declares She is a Lesbian

[essjay]

Hi All,
I'm still around!
It's been a week since I last posted anything. I have been reading lots of poeple's stories and the great advice they've been getting from Sandi2; 25yearsmlc; Wonka and Starsky309 etc etc. and trying to learn from it. Thank you to those that have commented - sorry i'm sure i've missed a lot of you great vets out..

A week of tension and despair for us. Despair at my perception of the hopelessness of our situation and the lack of any progress. Tension because of the relationships between us, and W and daughters. Youngest D is either always out of the house working or with her friends or in her bedroom (still a little concerned about her). Eldest daughter is still barely speaking to W. Both D's are fine with me and i'm continuing to be the best possible Dad I can be to them; we have been to dinner and to the cinema with other activities lined up. I also caught up with some old friends for dinner last weekend and they commented on how my W has changed! I didn't tell them anything.

Meanwhile W is continuing with her new life, on different websites now she told me. Texting and going out with and overnighting with her new best friends. Just before leaving for work this morning she told me she's going away for a few days "see you whenever". Couple of weeks ago that would have been a knife in the guts to me - but i held myself together and said "hope you have a good time" and just walked out. Getting better at detaching i hope. We used to go on holiday together this time of year,and now she's booked something without me.
She must be getting the same advice about detaching and no contact I think from her new friends who are helping her come out!The three of us don't hear from her as much as we used to when she's away on her business trips.
On the positive side..
A couple of hours later at work and she's texted me about nothing really - i haven't replied.
There are times though when we can chat as we used to.I can still make her laugh and there have been times when we have looked into each others eyes, instead of averted gazes (the norm)She still cooks and does other acts of service for me. Nothing initimate - just things that she really didn't have to do. Hope that makes sense?

I'm still going with my PMA as best I can around her. Given her lots of space and time. Definitely no pursuing or calling/texting. Garden is looking great! She's even commented on it and how she felt guilty at not having done anything!

I'm not getting anything back from her.She's on her own journey without us; if she has any guilt at all she's hiding it very well.

Think i'm getting stronger and getting to the stage where i think seperation is the best thing for us - Emotionally better for me and the girls but financially difficult though.

I wish nothing but the best for you all out there. Thanks for all your great advice it has helped to mend my/our broken hearts.
I hope that all your situations have the resolutions you want.

Jay