Need help

[lostluv]

"she can adjust her hours accordingly if she needs to start later....at least that is what she told me originally when she started. as much as I want to help, I cannot jeopardize my job either or we will REALLY be screwed."

And so how can you talk to her about this in a healthy manner?

I have talked to her a couple weeks ago and she realizes that it will eventually go back to the way it was when I didn't leave early. She just said that she would deal with it and then throws in a comment like "I've done it for a few years already". -- don't worry, i stayed calm and just reassured her I was trying to help.

right now, I'm staying at work on thursdays for my after shift meetings. I have told her it will soon need to be 2 days a week and asked if there was a better day for her . she said it didn't matter. So, I figured when the time is approaching I will talk to her again to see if anything has changed. more than likely each month I will have to add a day.

should I just put it on the table (in a polite way) and let her choose the day?

figured i would say something like this:
"my boss talked to me today and he is asking me to start staying one more day per week to attend the meeting at the end of my shift. I would like to have your input as to which day would work best for us. Is there a specific day that would be easier for you?"


when I mentioned adjusting her hours before, she said she can't....which I don't understand why because she could before. I know that it makes her day easier when she can start earlier and I realize she may not want to.

I hate to bring it up, but I remember her mentioning a few months ago that the male co-worker that I accused her of having the EA with starts early. I do not even bring that into the conversation though, and I cannot let that effect what I need to do to work on my marriage because I really have no control over that. however, I know that it makes her scheduling with treating patients easier when she can work together with the other therapists before they all have THEIR schedules for the day made.