It doesn't feel like a fairytale anymore...

[fthnluv]

Had another rough day today. Some days the depression or sadness is so much worse than others.

I went to church and spoke with my favorite fellow-church-goer. She is a sweet elderly lady who is praying for me and H and for the restoration of our M. She says she feels that something good is going to happen soon (I pray she's right, although "something" could be anything, I could use some good right now). She is just an amazing support and reminds me to stop the negative thinking and be a good example to my kids. I just adore her.

Came home and was able to take a nap for a bit while my parents helped me out with the kids. I've always thought it is odd that I rarely remember my dreams but I am happy about that these days, I have a feeling I would be having nightmares about H and the OW. I recently started taking melatonin before bed but I think I'm gonna back off of that because I am more aware of my dreams but I still don't remember them, really. Some people have reported crazy dreams with melatonin so I think I'll stop before they get too crazy.

Gonna try to do some work this week on getting ready to test to go back to college. I had started that before H announced he wanted a D and before I found out about the OW. I need to begin to move forward, if I can, to GAL.