Just skimming through. Would love to read EVERYTHING here but do no thave a lot of time these days. Was attracted to your title Mighty.

Read your post - you must be 'processing' so much! It's a lot for one person to carry. I think u definitely need family or friends for this. They'll shed some load (light too) and you will be able to think, handle better than in isolation.

AJ's post is a great read as well - another view of overall sitch. Now GO find your support! It will help you & from there, you'll move thro' SOME the other issues one by one esp. since you do not have control over all, like medical oness.
Take care pb

pbetra
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M: 15 yrs (in 2014)
BD: 6/03/2014
Infidelity ('known' from July 2014)
Denied PA Feb 2015
2 leave Mar 2015 (left early Summer). Some contact.
Back briefly 2017 (after family death)
Separated 2017