I wish I had the answer but i'm in a similar situation...
the friend zone
my H has no idea that I do not intend to share holidays and hang with his parents if we are divorced. Or to sit and shoot the chit about what's going on in my life. Nope. I do not intend to be his buddy.
So, if you don't mind, I'll sit by and grab a bag of popcorn and my notebook so I can take notes on what people respond to you.
DB definitely works... but reigniting the passion and the sex appeal... that's a harder thing to write an instruction book on, I guess.