Need help. Scared, confused, and hurting.

[Jefe]

You know, it's bad enough when something unexpected comes along and messes everything up, but it's far worse when perceived troubles come along that I create in my own head. Thanks for talking me down last night I don't know what came over me. Dumb. I need all of this to happen so we can get closer to a solution, anyway.

Starsky, you are correct this is very childish. Several years ago we had some sort of fight or disagreement and she got mad and "un-friended" me and changed the R status, (Dang, I just used an acronym) and I remember thinking and telling her at the time how high school-ish and immature that seemed. Should not have been surprised at all.

I was talking to my sponsor last night after our bible study meeting and he pointed out a few things that, in the middle of my fog, I missed. He said: "Keep doing whatever it is your doing because you've been pulling back and she obviously noticed. The FB thing, while stupid, was an attempt to get your attention and get you to react." Which I did both. He also reminded me of the Prodigal Son and that the father had given the son his freedom to do as he chose and then the father did not follow or chase after, instead he stayed home and got back to daily life. All things I intellectually know just needed someone else to say it.

He told me 2 weeks ago to Facebook fast. You guys have been telling me since I got here to get away or seriously limit FB. Wonder when I'm going to listen and do it. Hmm think I just identified another problem I cause in my marriage.