Hey bdub sorry it's been awhile since I've checked in. Being a couple weeks ahead of you with W leaving the home I can tell you it does make things a lot easier. Personally I haven't slept so well in the past 2 months as I have since W left. I also no longer fear going home to find her not there and wondering where she is or who she is with. While you will still think about and miss her constantly at least your home is once again a place you will be able to feel at peace.
As for the rings I personally still wear mine. I've always enjoyed being married and wear my ring with pride. If she sees me I hope she notices that I'm still wearing it as a little sign that I'm still fighting even if she has long given up. As a bonus it's a good way to keep the lady's away
Me 28 W 27 T 10 M 2 No kids (fertility issues - mine) Bomb 7/20/2014 - EA Confirmed W moved out 9/15/14 W dating OM 11/22/14
Good to see you again hoju. I was thinking about you the other day. I am going to go find your thread and get caught up. If I recall, we had BD about the same time but your W left a few weeks later.
M42 W40 T17 M15 S13 S11 BD 7-14 A discovered 7-14 WAW moved out 10-3-14 D final 2-23-15
Half an hour until I go home. W and BIL and FIL have been moving stuff all afternoon. Luckily I am keeping most of the furniture so the house will not be super empty. I still expect it to be a shock. On the bright side, the 19 boxes that cluttered my dining room and kitchen will be gone.
Tonight will be night #1 of just me and the boys.
M42 W40 T17 M15 S13 S11 BD 7-14 A discovered 7-14 WAW moved out 10-3-14 D final 2-23-15
Had a friend over that has kids the same age as mine. The kids are good friends and are together often. It was sort of surreal in the house but peaceful and calm. The relief I feel out weighs the sadness today. I know rough times are coming but the anxiety, stress and tension that comes from living with a WAW are gone. I am no longer in limbo. I pray God that my W is safe tonight and that she feels the same peace that I feel. Dissapointed that she has not contacted s13 but it is just night 1. She must have had an exhausting day prepping the new place, moving her stuff, and starting to settle in. The boys a are dissapointed she is gone but I assured them she will be here to get them in the morning. The tears I have are true sadness tonight. Not for the way things have gone and the dealings of the last few months, but, for the first time, cor the end of a 15 year long chapter of my life. Tomorrow I will turn the page and begin the next phase. I will become a man only a fool would leave. I will become a better man for myself and my family.
M42 W40 T17 M15 S13 S11 BD 7-14 A discovered 7-14 WAW moved out 10-3-14 D final 2-23-15
Last night went fantastic. This morning was great. I hated leaving for work this morning but I will get to see the boys again this afternoon for soccer.
Currently trying to work out issues with the boys via tm right now. She wants to keep them tonight so her alternating Saturdays will not interfere with plans she has for weekends in the future, I want to keep them tonight so that I dont start off the separation with 4 night alone without the boys. I offered to flip a coin, she discounted my reasons for wanting them and criticized me for not accomodating her social schedule. The events are every other weekend, none of which she can take the boys she says. This interaction may go a long ways in detemining how we navigate the coming months.
M42 W40 T17 M15 S13 S11 BD 7-14 A discovered 7-14 WAW moved out 10-3-14 D final 2-23-15
Ok so we worked it out. I am going to keep them tonight, she will keep them on my wednesday and then I will keep them again next saturday. Her idea. I get my time this weekend, she gets her "trouble" saturdays free. She even called me to make sure it was completely clear and to talk about a few other things about clothes etc etc. Thats the good part.
The bad part: I am going to allow myself to mindread. OM has his kids every other weekend so W had to get our weekends set just right so they had kids at the same time and had free weekends at the same time. The good part about this is that for right now I dont have to worry about the boys being exposed to OM and his kids. If this is even the case, I dont know.
The sad part: She said she would "have" to send the boys to her moms for saturday the first 3 saturdays she would have them. That, to me, is sad. The fact that she would ship her kids to her moms for a birthday party, going out of town, and a craft show just demonstrates the fog she is in. Anyway, thats her issue now. How she handles the boys is on her from now on. She is the one in control of those relationships. I am in control of mine. Along the same lines I made sure she understood that I was the boys father and that I would like to have the opportunity to keep them whenever she needs someone to watch them. She said she had not even thought about that. She said I would be her first call. I dont expect to be the first call every time but hopefully I will get some bonus time here and there. I could see how this has been an oversite. For 13 years if "we" (now her) had to find someone to watch the boys "we" (now her) called my mom or her mom. So I am sure, in her mind she was thinking " I need someone to watch the boys, I will call mom"
M42 W40 T17 M15 S13 S11 BD 7-14 A discovered 7-14 WAW moved out 10-3-14 D final 2-23-15
