Having an interesting day/evening in terms of interactions with H. As I mentioned, yesterday was our anniversary and we had a nice lunch together. We also ML. Later in the afternoon we went to MC. We both seemed to think it was good, although certainly it stirred up some stuff.
Today I sent H a flirtatious text. He didn't reply for a long time, then sort of a lame text. I replied and basically said "hey, it's ok if you're not feeling it right now, we can't always be in the same place at the same time". He replied "thank you" and that was it. I asked him about his day and said it was "ok". I said "I hope it gets better." To night he texted me and said "it did not get better". I replied and said "I'm sorry, what happened?". He said "Just a bad day." Now I know I'm minding reading but he talks to me about work all the time so if it was not work related I can't help but feel it's about us.
Interestingly, while my stomach aches to think that he's perhaps (again!) struggling with his feelings for me, I don't at all feel desperate or like doing all the pursuing/temp checking type behaviors that go along with the fear of losing him. I feel like I'm getting closer and closer to being really ok if this ends.
M: 42 H: 43 M: 8 years S7 and D4 H has D19 and S25 from previous M Bomb: 3/6/14 OW discovered, EA & PA 1st separation, 10 days, decided to reconcile & moved back in. Fail 2nd separation: 5/1/14
