The one thing that I can say about Eric's very good post is that I didn't stand out of "fear". I stood because I saw the person I have loved for so long and through so much in obvious pain and crisis. I saw her not sleeping, losing weight to the point of looking anorexic, acting crazy, seeing only the bad in almost everyone and everything in her life except her father and her work. I saw her blaming me and her M as a coping thing, a way to explain why she was so unhappy. If her reasons and spews made any sense, were coherent that would be a different matter. I stood because I made a promise that I would be there in good times and bad, to death do us part and this is definitely a "bad" time for her. I didn't promise only if she felt the same or only if she still feels love towards me. I stood because I would hope that the person I M would have stood for me if I was going through a crisis like my W is. I stood for all the ways that my W loved me for so many years and I loved her in return. Because she is the mother of my children and I appreciate that she choose to have them with me. So many reasons, none of which is fear. Fear of what? I know in the end I can take care of myself. I know that even without my w I will have a great R with my kids. For the last several years I took care of almost every aspect of running the family so I know I can handle that. I'm not afraid that I will spend the rest of my life alone as I get along well will other people and am not intimidated by women or think that no one will "love" me again. Nor am I afraid of living alone which can actually be nice at times. No, not fear.
^^^THAT, in my book, is the "Right" thing.
Very well stated Matt, and I feel the same way.
You are a man of true integrity who has shown much love for his wife. No one can EVER take that from you.
M: A really long time. Crisis: 5 years. She's still worth it.
Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. -Viktor Frankl
