Oh geez, it wasn't that....things have been out of control busy. I wanted to find a time when I could sit an write enough - moments have been fleeting. XW has been back at the house a lot and I have committed to myself to NOT bury myself in my laptop when she is there with S.....not going back THERE again.
The points that you brought up are quite valid, 25, I can shirk any of them. And I assure you they either have been or will be covered in counseling -- we are still going. The affection is getting better, we sleep in the same bed again -- and so on.
One thing gets to me, though, 25. You may be singlehandedly responsible for me finally determining that in order for me to move forward there are elements of the past that I need to let go of. Specifically, perceptually reality differences between me and XW....i.e., how she saw me during the divorce and how I actually was. What of that stuff, if any, is worth revisiting at this point? We both saw the same car wreck and we both described it differently. I cannot invalidate her reality any more than she can invalidate mine.
The snooping is an unhealthy compulsion born out of a feeling of not know what is going on (real or imagined) - I am trying to put a collar on it and told my IC that I had done it. She quickly lit me up for violating her boundaries....and she was/is right.
