Newbie Errors- Restarting the R- part 2

[pearlharbr]

"As much as I'd love to reconcile, I'm afraid it's more complicated than that now. I need time to think about this."

Yep, this is pretty much what I said. This was followed by my H (then exBF) telling me all the reasons why we should attempt reconciliation. After a couple days I told him that I wouldn't even consider it unless and until he was completely NC with OW. That meant sending a NC letter that I approved and having total transparency by giving me all passwords to all accounts. I also insisted that we have the financial settlement worked out and signed (since we weren't married that was the extent of the business end of the relationship).

And after that happened I told him that was a start but I still needed time. Because I did need time to sort out if I was willing to give him another chance. It wasn't a tactic.