After a couple days of reflecting, I can't help wonder if MC proposed this option as a result of W's one on one session. A lot of mind reading here, but I know W struggles with separating OM and this new group of friends. Her view- we've been apart for a full year and in that time she's formed new friendships and created a new life for herself. I get that. Me asking her to give up OM contact in her mind is asking to give up this circle of friends, otherwise she would always have to find out if he was going to show up (this much she told me).
I still need to think on this and it definitely needs discussed further in MC, but if I was to decide to go this route, the minimum required would be- some type of communication to OM (and friends) that no one on one contact occurs (email, text, etc) and that it's clear W and I are working on MR, all gifts/texts/emails destroyed, facebook either shut down or he's blocked, she agrees to notify me of any contact... The question is- is this enough to make me feel confident in rebuilding trust in W??
Has anyone seen a case of this being successful when OP is not removed completely? MDU's sitch is the only one I see remotely 'similar', although that's more out of necessity (work).
Sandi- W has told me in MC that they still talk occasionally, but really not that often anymore. That she's told him that her and I are working on things. If facebook remains their primary mode of communication, I believe her as I rarely see her on there anymore. I used to see her on, then off, then on again, which to me meant they were texting. haven't seen that in weeks.
