I still have the thoughts in the back of my mind of can I really forgive H. On the outside and to him it seems I have but internally I really struggle with it.
I don't have any particular advice about this, however, it seems to happen a lot with people. The LBS is so hyper-focused on wanting the WAS back until it's like a delayed emotion that hits them later when they don't know if they can forgive.
In the beginning, all you could think about was H coming home. How much resentment are you really feeling now? I am concerned you will try to push all that down, in order to carry on going forward. I wish you two had giving it more time, but I understand.
Don't hold back on expressing your frustrations, hurt, etc., during the C sessions. It won't heal and can't get it worked out unless it is all laid out.
Ironic, isn't it? Sometimes life just suks.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
