Thank you SOOOOOO MUCH Young...what great suggestions...
I did go to an adult store with the purpose of getting a prostate massager...we've used it a couple times but he's not quite sure it's doing anything. It's really nothing more than a plug. So giving me an actual name of one, helps tremendously. Thank you for that. We've talked about he pump, but I'm not so sure it's necessary...yes he has the ED, but we use the medication when needed (altho, that does't always seem to work)...and the other day, no meds were needed
Your explanation of LD/HD in all areas makes perfect sense and we try to keep that balance as well. for ex: this weekend I am going to a drum circle (its for females only or he'd join me) and next weekend he (or we) will go to a car show. We are working on doing one person's 'thing' in a balanced way...rather than always doing what I/He wants on the w/ends and causing resentment.
lately the mantra "We're in this together" keeps going thru my head...even wrote it on the mirror the other day. I think it's finally hitting home with me that this man wants to be with me for the rest of his life! How amazing! And, of course, I want to be with him the rest of my life. I noticed recently that i tend to pull into myself, thinking (on a deeply subconscious level)that I have no one but me to count on. And that isn't true. my first H cheated with me, then on me (shocker, right?) When our M ended it was him telling me that he no longer wanted to be married (to which I internalized that I am not 'good enough' to be married to)...now this guy comes along, once bitten; twice shy about marriage due to his unfaithful wife of 24 yrs...and we fall in love and are together some 8 years before he pops the question and another 4 till we tied that knot...during those years, deep down I still felt that I wasn't good enough to marry. We recently celebrated our 1st wedding anniversary and I've come to realize that I am good enough, he does want to be married to me!
I know I'm rambling on, but these are some insights I'm having that may just be what has been holding be back from opening up and accepting that he and I are, in fact, in this together. And ya know what? It's not so scary.
