Barrybran - [Insert Original Thread Title Here]

[Barrybran]

I'm so pissed off right now. D4 was being incredibly difficult this morning by refusing to do anything of which she was asked. I wound up yelling at her because asking nicely wasn't getting anywhere (yeah, I know, I'm wrong) and my wife wasn't helping at all. I even wound up having to brush D4's teeth because she refused to do it herself and my wife had to take her somewhere. My wife suggested I pinned D4 down to brush her teeth which I called her out on and started a fight between us.

This patience thing is really testing me. My wife shows absolutely no desire in reconciling and I'm surprisingly OK with that. The part that gets me is that by now even she knows that sitting on things gets us nowhere instead of talking things out and trying to move things forward, not necessarily returning our marriage to what it was but just dealing with issues and trying to build a friendship. I'm a creature of logic so emotions baffle me at the best of times but if you have a problem at work, you don't let it linger, you deal with it and move forward.

I have also had some issues in knowing which issues to bring to attention with my wife and which to leave. I've been a doormat and one of the things my wife raised was expressing my feelings. Long story short, the last time I raised my feelings my wife said she felt as though everything she did was wrong and has yet to explain why she said that. That was two months ago and things haven't been the same since. They haven't gone backwards per se but they haven't move forwards either and I've kept a lot more to myself. I know by now that our relationship can only move forward when she's prepared to listen to me and talk issues out. Surprisingly, I've been OK and just moved on with my own things understanding that I can't push her.

Today bugs me though because instead of dealing with a situation like my daughter, she leaves it up to me and then has a crack at me because she's not happy with how I handle that. That's not on. My feeling is you either discuss it, stay out of it or get involved in the first place. I know I handled the situation with my daughter wrong and I've got to work on that. I just wish I knew how to handle my wife because not dealing with things and then having a go at me makes things worse, not better.