In limbo, need to figure out next steps (thread #5

[shodan]

I continue to pray for my W, my family and everyone on this board. I am focusing more on my work, my activities and myself in general. I actually told my W that I had asked for more responsibility at work. I have been slacking these past ~four months (for good reason :)) and know that I need to get more focused. She actually responded that she would like that, would allow her to quit her job, which is causes her a ton of stress.

I know there is a lot still to do to improve me and ultimately be a better husband, whether for my W or someone else. My IC has helped me a lot with coming to grips with my control and anger issues in the past. I have identified a lot of stress triggers that can lead to control or anger tendencies on my part. I also am learning to just let things go and not worry so much.

From a detaching perspective:
- I continue to remind myself that I cannot control her
- I am not snooping or even wondering where she is
- I am not jumping to conclusions about anything
- My W seems to want to connect with me when we are around each other, but of course I see this as cake eating more than anything. I have been hurt by her too many times to believe that any positive changes actually mean something to her.

From a GAL perspective:
- Thursday I am going to an event here at my work after work, so I won't be home until late
- This weekend I have tickets for my family to see Lion King and then go to dinner afterwards. My DB coach said to do family events from time to time.
- I also am coaching soccer on Sunday and working out with a friend Sunday morning
- Next week I will have another guitar lesson and am meeting a friend for dinner on Friday night
- I assume that my W will be traveling next week to NYC so we will have some time apart from each other
- Columbus Day weekend I am going to visit my parents. My kids will be with my MIL. My wife asked if she should come with me (my mom had a severe stroke three months ago) and I said that I would be fine on my own.
- I am traveling the week after that for work for a few days

I am still trying to find that "other" activity that I can do to get me out of the house more and meet new people. A friend of mine is trying to get me to do cross fit. I thought about rock climbing but the places are not that close to me. I also was considering boxing 1-2 times per week (there is a place near my work).

Praying for everyone and sending lots of love.