Hi I'm new, I hope I won't be a burden... prt 4

[25yearsmlc]

Need help.. was too embarrassed to ask since the last time i was here and how i was.. but i want to be a man and ask for help..

Anyone willing to do this for me?

I'm confused. Do what "for" you? We cannot ask for help FOR you. I can offer you help/advice.


But I did that before.

1wish, I'm almost 100% positive that you took ZERO advice from me, Bond, Wonka, Claire and or anyone that I can think of, here. I cannot think of one thing we suggested that you did. But You did A LOT that we advised against you doing....

Hey, I'm Not trying to slap you around about it, just want to ask you a question.

What can WE make of that ^^ fact, except that you ONLY want advice that is very easy for you to take?

Thing is, NONE of us have advice that is easy!

None of us got any "easy" advice for our situations either, but we kept at it. Some of us have restored our marriages; some have not.

But I and every DBer I just named above ^^^, HAVE DONE HARD WORK ON OURSELVES. All of us are better for it.

We took advice. The question remains,

CAN YOU FOLLOW ADVICE - even when you think it'll be difficult??

IF NOT, then save yourself (and us) some time and heartache.

Give up on the m to this woman. Go to school, grow into the man you want to become & either try to get your wife back OR find another woman who'll be your partner, lover, friend, & mother of your children;

OR stay the same as you are now, but if you do that, you need to marry a woman who will do as she is told, and never question you. Probably a fundamentalist Muslim woman...

Granted, there are many trade offs to the Boss/Servant type of marriage.

For instance, you'll never know if you as 1Wish really are lovable, as opposed to feared.

In a marriage that allows one person (i.e. the man) to control everything --from what the wife wears to WHETHER she will speak, let alone WHAT she says...

the Man will never be loved for who HE really is, but will be "obeyed" b/c of a cultural bigotry that enables bullying & prevents/suppresses individuality...

AND granted, a relationship of Unequals is never as genuine or real as one between equals,

AND granted, a marriage where one person makes all the choices, can be tiring & frustrating for both people,

AND Granted, you'll limit the amount of TRUE intimacy in a marriage b/c no subservient woman can feel very close to the man who controls and dominates her...

but maybe having a woman who feels a deep, mature Love for you, who knows the real you and loves you anyhow,

is NOT as important as having a woman you can control.


Decide what matters MOST to you, decide to take advice even when it's hard

OR decide not to and move along.

Let us know what you decide,okay?