Please try to remember that those feelings for the XOW are not going go away overnight. It will slowly peter off over several weeks/months. I remember when I broke off with an ex-GF two years ago, it took some time for me to get over her and move into the strictly friends zone.
You must see that H is opening up more and more to you. You would want that to continue for it is the opening of the window to you as his martial partner. That is a very positive and encouraging sign. Over time, the feelings for the XOW will fade away into nothingness.
Rome wasn't built in a day.
Trust the process and be real gentle with H. You have a lot going for you. Keep it up.
