Geez, kevin, read this and absorb it! As I said before, YOU are responsible for how you react to your W...don't go down the victim's path! It will not be appealing to her and it will bring you down, way down. You really have not ever put DBing into practice...so follow the advice given here...otherwise, you'll be repeating the past all over again.
I know I know... When am I going to wake up to her manipulation.. As long as she gets her cake and eats it too she is happy with the sitch... Well I am not.... I am miserable.... Taking the kids out and excluding her is a great idea...
Honesty, sincerity, tenderness and trust. A little less time for the rest of the world, And more for the two of us. Kisses each mornin, I love yous at night, Just like it used to be.
Guess what? She knows you are miserable and she knows she is having her cake and eating it too. Quote: "Well maybe I wil spend it with my wife and kids if I am lucky.." You've got to stop that way of thinking, and I can promise you it comes across as totally needy and personally, I think that she sees that in you. You need to really work on becoming your own person and stop putting all of your identity into your W...been there, done that, and I will never fall for that again. I don't know what else to tell you here...but until you really put forth an EFFORT to DB, your sitch will probably stay the same. From what I have read, the minute she wants to do something, you jump...and then you are miserable the next day. Think about what these people are telling you...
Your right after last night. I am through. Time to set the plan into action. Time to detach and do things without her. Just me and the kids.. She keeps telling me she just doesnt see us together right now... ok.. fine.. No more easy kevin.. Straight to the point, no more sex with my wife.. She just breaks my heart afterwards... I am going out saturday night.. Without my W knowing where I am going... I am going to take the kids out for an early dinner. Then out for myself.. Maybe Hooters.. Then a bar Or maybe a movie.. I dot know. Hck I might even meet a nice woman while I am out.. Not that, that is the goal here.. But it would be nice to have someone I can talk to besides the W..hell I cant talk to her anyways, our conversations are all about her...
Honesty, sincerity, tenderness and trust. A little less time for the rest of the world, And more for the two of us. Kisses each mornin, I love yous at night, Just like it used to be.
And another thing, when conversing with her, do not act angry...put on a good act, be evasive, tell her that you need to start doing other things since you are separated. Even if she loses it, keep your cool and keep DBing...take your kid out without her, ya'll can have plenty of fun on your own. If she balks at that, again, tell her that you have been thinking about what she has said, and the overall healthiest thing for everyone is to do your own thing...you cannot save her, you cannot DO enough for her to make her want you right now...her choice, so go on and start living. She is going to try to get a reaction from you, as in the past...just be prepared for it and do not act on it.
your right. I have got to stop playing her game.. Its time to start my game plan.. Yall have given me some sound advice here.. I have got to move on and make her miss me.. It was working in the past, I just caught up in the little attention I got from it..
Honesty, sincerity, tenderness and trust. A little less time for the rest of the world, And more for the two of us. Kisses each mornin, I love yous at night, Just like it used to be.
It really looks like she responds better when you pull back a little more. Besides, living your life the way you want to live it is going to be good for you. It will give you the confidence that everything will be ok, with or without her.
BTW, a side effect of this is that it will make you attractive. The more new friends, new interests, new happiness you've found will intrigue her to think what she is missing out on. Of course you would prefer life with her. But why keep falling in the same hole when you know exactly where it is, walk around it.
Honesty, sincerity, tenderness and trust. A little less time for the rest of the world, And more for the two of us. Kisses each mornin, I love yous at night, Just like it used to be.
ok havent been doing much dbing this week. Actually I have been just going with the flow.. No presure at all. I have been spending quality time with my Wife and kids. W has asked me to stay all weekend.. I have been staying there at night since Friday.. She told me last night she was really confused about what to do.. This morning we were talking on the phone and she asked me out on a date..
Honesty, sincerity, tenderness and trust. A little less time for the rest of the world, And more for the two of us. Kisses each mornin, I love yous at night, Just like it used to be.
