Dealing with WAW part 6

[mindsin]

I believe that when one has reached the point of justifying destructive actions, It becomes very easy to lie to oneself.

I should know, as I've cheated on my W repeatedly over a 5 year span. Everything I was doing felt "right", and I refused to believe any of it was hurting her. Even when the times I was caught, I thought to myself, "Every man is wired this way. This is just a physical release -- like getting a lap dance at a strip club. I'm not sure why she's so upset. It's not like I want to take these women home. I only love my W. She'll get over it".

[pilot]

It also just occurred to me today that when I facetime with my kids (when w has them) it is always from inside her car. Maybe twice has been from her apt, and always pointing towards a corner.

Just more mystery as to what I am not supposed to see inside there....

[AWAW]

Don't mind read man, you'll drive yourself nuts. It could be nothing, or worse she could just be messing with your head.

In the end, what really matters are the kids faces and voices. Not the mystery surrounding the location. Let that part go man!

[1foot2]

I've heard the same thing about the kids being better off, from my W who has barely interacted with our amazing, happy, easy 18 month old in several weeks. It's pure justification. It feels like a cult abducted my W.

[pilot]

W seems to have softened her demeanor, at least for today. She had sent me a couple of texts last night, and today the same. When facetiming with the kids, she turned the camera on herself a bit to talk. Not mind reading into anything, and today may just be a fluke where she is feeling charitably nice :P

[Ss06]

I'm happy to hear this. she's a tough nut to crack, that's for sure. She's probably doing a lot of mind reading herself, pilot, and I wonder if that's part of her up and downs with regard to her interaction with you. She seems moody but I wonder if she's spinning and just has NO idea what to do or say. Who knows. It's quite a ride.

[pilot]

A WAS mind reading.... Hah, I never really thought of that. I guess it is because as a LBS we are usually pretty eager to be upfront, open, and honest on request.

[Ss06]

Yes but the "on request" part sometimes is perceived as showing vulnerability and the WAS doesn't want to seem vulnerable so she's not going to ask.

[LisaB]

Hey pilot, have you tried vossy's technique of thinking something positive when you mindread something negative? Like "why isn't she letting me see into her apartment? is it because she has OM?" becoming "I bet she doesn't want me to see into her apartment because she has a giant shrine dedicated to worshipping me in there!" haha

How annoying is this stupid rollercoaster?

I'm glad she is being more talkative lately!

Hugs, LisaB

[Old Dog]

It's because the place is in a state. Clothes all over the place, the plates from the previous three meal still on the table, and empty bottles of booze lying around.