Need help. Scared, confused, and hurting.

[Jefe]

I am doing the best I can.
My emotional state swings from one extreme to the other, minute to minute, sometimes. I have lost 15-20 pounds, I haven't really slept in weeks, I don't want to work, I just want to crawl under the bed and stay there for days, but I can't. I have 2 daughters to raise and be strong for. I feel like I am doing a crappy job some days.

So, it really hurts to see her out having a happy time with friends, staying out every night at the pool halls (She now has time to play in 2 separate pool leagues, yay). Generally doing everything but being a wife and mother. She told me 2 weeks ago that she was happier being away from me. Gee, with zero responsibility to anyone but herself, I wonder why?

I'm working on me as best I can. And trying to just surrender - let go and let God, but damn, it's hard some days.

Thanks for the support guys.