Am I the only LD here?

[LDWIFE1]

Amber,

All I can say to your story about last night is WOW, and good for you for making the effort! Does your H have a day job as a male porn star?

LOL, no, but he should. he's always wanted to be in porn.

The only times I can "hold out" and I am talking a few more minutes, not hours, is when I have had a fair amount to drink, or when I have been MB with porn. There have been times when my W hasn't been stepping to the plate enough that I have myself and one of the issues with porn is that it creates unrealistic expectations, sometimes conscious sometimes not. So if I have been doing that, things that would have been exciting with my W can become less so. Not saying that is the issue with your H, but you might want to discuss it. If so, are you ready to commit to a more frequent schedule if he commits to staying away from MB?

there has been some discussion on porn and MB and how long it can take him. but in all honesty at that time I was not ready to step up to more frequency and I just dropped the subject and he occasionally does the MB to porn thing (I say that because he has decreases his porn usasge quite a bit since we had discussed it). IMHO, I think it has a lot more to do w/porn as he has been MB to it for many years before I ever came along...his first wife was, hmmm, how do I say this?...not a very kind, loving, giving woman. I'll leave it at that..
so, yes, i think mayhaps the MB and porn thing have something to do w/his lasting so long. And the ups and downs during that time. I think we have a few steps to take before we really get into THAT discussion/issue though. I think he may need to know that I'm ready (and *I* need to be ready) to step up to the 'task' as it were.

Any other thoughts as to what it could be? I know some medications have that affect as well.

Again though, good for you for stepping up last night and this morning!

CB

thanks. I'm not sure what else it could be other than stress, health issues (that no dr has seemed to figure out as he has spoken with several about this issue) and just the way he is *shrug*