OW (a friend of H's sister) and H have been done with their affair for a long time. Apparently she's married and was not only sleeping with H, but another guy, too, at the same time. It boggles my mind, but I digress - she and this guy have been on and off and she may or may not be leaving her husband for him (I don't know what's true and what's not).
Through a convoluted circle of friends and circumstances, last night the other guy found out that OW had slept with H. It DID NOT come from me; I have no interest or care in OW and her life. It came from a mutual friend who is going through something similar and had good, albeit misguided intentions. The other guy confronted OW, who apparently broke down sobbing and then admitted to the whole thing.
Then the other guy asked to meet up with me and the friend that spilled the beans (in a strange coincidental twist, the two are apparently very good, life-long friends), because he wanted to catch up with her and hear my side of the story. I basically only told him what H had told me, that I had seen email and video proof it had happened, and confirmed the dates that I was told it all occurred. He told me that OW and he were trying to make a legitimate "go" of their relationship and she had filed for a D with her husband last month. He's going to sleep on what he wants to do regarding their R.
We had a beer. We parted ways.
As I was driving home, apparently OW texted H and sold him a sob story that I was picking on her and causing trouble for the fun of it. She pumped his head full of half-truths...and some completely made up bull.
In turn, H blew up at me, reaming me a new one through text messages, and accusing me of all kinds of lies OW put into his head; including that she and her H are trying to work on their marriage and me bringing this up is dangerous to that. He says "this woman I haven't talked to in forever is suddenly blowing up my phone" and he doesn't appreciate it, or the associated drama. He accused me of showing the other guy all the proof -- emails and the video. He accused us of going through his email, which I haven't done since the day I found out about the A and then gave my word I was done snooping and would respect his privacy from there on out. His texts were super long and super frequent, that I couldn't keep up. Plus, I was driving. He refused to call me so we could talk about it voice to voice, so I told him I couldn't respond with a book via text while I was driving and I'd talk to him when I got home. I stopped answering.
When I got home I told him that, first of all, he had the situation totally wrong. I explained what went down in actuality (how it wasn't ME that started anything and I NEVER showed the other guy f*&^ all). I told him if I had wanted to cause poop with OW, I would have done it two months ago when I found out about the A.
I then told him that the story I heard from the other guy was not at all what OW was telling H, and that I didn't care what the truth was either way -- OW and other guy's poop is between them and I couldn't give less of a poop about it.
THEN I told him that he had some pretty big balls to be yelling at me and upset at me for supposedly causing drama; me the woman he cheated on and hurt. I've done nothing wrong and I won't be treated like I have, period. If he didn't want drama in his life, he should have thought of that before he boned another woman, one with a husband and another man besides that.
The conversation ended pretty amicably (by which I mean I could tell he at least believed me that I didn't start any of it and wasn't looking to cause trouble), though I know things will still be strained for a while.
H knows I'm a truthful person and I've never played him false before. I'm SO emotionally exhausted today.
BF:40 M:33 SD: 12 T: 8, never married, no kids together BD: 8/4, "I'm just done", "...too tired and burnt to try". PA confirmed 8/5 "It happened, but it's been over for almost a year".
