Thanks twinmom, I know you are, and I have been working or trying to work solely on me, I know that I had major contributions to the way our marriage ended up, and I gave made amazing inroads to changing those behaviors for myself and whatever future r I have, either with h or another person. gg, anxiety is a horrible to suffer and I have had it for as long as I can remember, a lot of my issues stem from needing to control everything, and the one thing I have learned through all of this is that the only thing you have control over are your own actions and behaviors. There have been s many times over the past few months that I have wanted to take control or think that I want to take control and I have stepped back. even in the past week, I have amazed myself with my actions, when ow sent me the message to tell me she had broken up with h, I did not respond, to me she was trying to bait me, and old me would have fallen hook line and sinker and responded with something sarcastic, nasty and cold. It was obviously a ploy to drag me into the drama, as h and she are seeing each other again. yesterday ow posted how happy she was with h and tagged him in it so everyone that we have as mutual friends saw it also, it was at that point I said no more, and deleted h off my Fb. H then rang last night, acting like nothing was wrong and I told him it was nothing short of disrespectful. I sent a message reiterating these points, he responded saying that he had heard what I'd said and that he would still like to have dinner tonight as a family (what a joke) and to talk. I responded with I'd be happy to have dinner however I didn't want anymore bomb drops, was there anything in particular he wanted to discuss. His response was no bd, nothing in particular and that he'd ring today. Going to work on pma today and breathe for tonight
