trc, I certainly won't defend your W's current behavior or personality. But remember that this really is like an abducted, changed person. Maybe this is who she will be for the rest of her life, maybe the old, marriage-loving W will return someday, and maybe even a new and improved, faithful W will return. Point being, if you are able to fully reconcile like your mom did with your dad, it will not be with the person who is sleeping around outside of your marriage. If you make it, she would be a changed, vastly person, too, not just you. I would not blame you for a second for dropping the rope if that's what you felt is best for you, but don't think you are doing all of this work to try to save an M with a weak-minded adulterer. That's not who you would remain married to.
Me 38, WAW 30 D11 (former marriage) S2 T 8 years M 3 years BD 8/20/23 S 8/20/23
