It's just hard for me to see her at all thinking/feeling anything close to hurt or guilt over what she is doing and I also see that in many other sitchs.
Matt, your W and mine have a lot of similarities, so take this possibility...she does feel guilt, maybe not remorse, that comes later... if/when they hit rock bottom.. but she ain't there yet.
My W feels a LOT of guilt, and sadness, she has said it repeatedly... so much that she is running hard and fast from those feelings, pushing them down and creating a wall around them until she can deal with it, if she ever can.
Contact with me or the kids reminds her of those feelings, what she is doing. She has to/wants to see the kids, so, guess who she HAS to drop, to AVOID overwhelm????
^^^ straight from stbxw's mouth.....
And I am glad there is little contact now, TBH... contact, especially voice or in person, slows down MY healing.
She is doing what she has to do for herself.
I am doing what I have to do for myself and our kids.
Get out of her head, it's scary in there.... and get into yours.
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
