We are all on the same tribe, for sure. There is no one outside of here, that I know of, that could understand all we go through.
I hope you were able to get back to sleep, Matt!
Thanks for stopping by
Cat,
Quote:
I am curious though, how was the communication between the two of you really? I would think that anything regarding the kids would be conversation relevant even if he wasnt a part of the decision making process.
Our communication was fairly good, overall (or so I thought)....until the last 2 years. It cold have been better, for sure.
We weren't expert communicators, but we always discussed money, kids, plans, things that were bothering us. Everything that was day to day involving the kids, school, medical, schedule, money... was all discussed and agreed upon. We rarely disagreed.
What we didn't discuss together was my kids relationship with their dad, and we rarely talked about xh at all. Only logistics....if he was going to see them etc.
It took me a long time to get past some things that happened in my first M, and H and I didn't want to waste energy on xh or the past. I thought I had dealt with everything in counseling, separate from our M.
H never bad-mouthed my xh. But he knew what happened, and talking about it would make him upset. So we left the topic of xh alone as much as possible.
I went back and read emails and there is a huge difference in our communication from before and after MLC
I can remember a specific event that I first realized something was way off....
I brought up an issue regarding the kids, and H reaction just didn't make sense. Not only that, but he just couldn't get past it. And we ended up turning the car around and skipping a barbecue because of the argument. This was not us at all.
bea,
Thank you for your perspective. I can't imagine being spewed at any chance possible.
