Hi friends! Thanks for the kind words of support! Ahoy you are doing great too, so strong and independent. We all have those down moments.
Glad to hear that things are going in the positive direction for you Joe! Yipee!
Yesterday had a short text message conversation with the WAH that he initiated. A few weeks back I remember thinking "if he starts sending me funny links or photos it means he wants to impress me".
Then out of the blue he sent me a funny link.
It wasn't until later in the day that I remembered my previous thought and found it interesting. I remember when I originally had that idea I felt full of hope that one day this would be a small sign. But then when it happened I didn't really notice it.
I don't know, I am still feeling quite sad in my situation. I have not been snooping or looking at his facebook page so I have no idea what he is up to. But still it takes a lot of control not to look. And not to think about it. I guess in the grand scheme I am doing better. I don't have constant murderous thoughts about OW, just simmering hate. My life is very busy and mostly happy.
I guess I just miss ... love and sex!
I find myself thinking 50% of the time about WAH and 50% of the time about how to find a new guy. I am vaguely flirting with a few guys but nothing serious at all and I don't find them to be viable candidates anyway.
I know we have talked about this before but I just find it unfair that my H is out and about dating, having sex and falling in love with OW and others, and I am not. I don't even know why or if I want him back. I feel torn.
I'm just venting here. My real life friends of course are all about "move on" and encourage me to date others. I don't feel pressured by them but I do feel I want to date! I miss having affection, romance, flirting, attraction, sex etc etc. And I'm finding it hard to see why I should deprive myself.
I know I need to keep the focus on myself now and keep growing and bettering myself. But I'm lonely in a way. Not at all lonely for a social life or work life but for a love life.
