RPP, probably some of it is that we're not sharing the good parts. But also, we are here to share what went wrong. We don't share the good memories. But I knew without hesitation that my H would understand how rough my weekend was, and he did. He told me about a conversation with his dad and I also knew in only a small number of words exactly how it was and why he was frustrated. (Which is good since I only ever get a small number of words).
It's probably also true that we are used to the cr*p and it doesn't seem so bad. And I know that what I've seen of other people's relationships has made me highly aware of how many different kinds of bad there are, and I'll take the known bad, thank you very much.
But at the end of the day... isn't it just true that we're emotionally invested? Many of us have kids and recognize that we'll be together even if we're not "together" for many years. We have a shared history so that certain things can not be known of us without the accompanying knowledge of the spouse? When you marry, it's a permanent part of your story.
My H is a good guy with cr@ppy relationship skills and an unreasonable sense of what life is like. He lacks awareness of his own power over his circumstances. He is also kind of lazy and the ADD thing probably is tripping him up too. Shall I trade that for a guy who is fanatical about local politics? Or an awesome lover with bipolar disorder? Or someone who is a fantastic boyfriend but turns out to be an awful stepdad? I think my H is worth the effort. But it's OK if others don't.
Me42, H40 D12, S8, S7 A revealed: 7/13 Sep 4/14; Agreed to D 1/15
