I guess I'm just feeling a little down today. But I also wanted to be honest with myself in that I may know that this is about her, not me. I may know that I had little to do with what my W is doing but at the same time knowing something and really feeling deep down are two different things. I need to shut that little voice up, I know. But it's not as easy as it sounds!
BUT it does get better. Often times I think, "If I did everything it appears he wanted and needed would we be here?" And the answer is a resounding YES...because they don't know what they want or need...and chances are when they were with us (if we look at it in hindsight) we gave them everything they needed and wanted at the time and now they want something different, and they will continue to want something different until...THEY FIX THEMSELVES!!!
I guess I do a lot of "thinking" and these are the types of things I have to remind myself of when the times get hard. Being honest with yourself is part of the process and in my opinion is a healthy way to live and get through this time and so much more.
I also understand where you are with the kid thing...I'm going through my fair share of the kid/parent drama myself...and you know what...I know I have the best interest for my kids and will continue to act in that manner. I let my Shmoopie hang himself time and time again with our children, and after almost two years, I see that my kids aren't so confused anymore...they are downright angry and tired of the crap. They will do what they need to do, and you just have to trust that they see you as a guiding light and will act in a manner that you can support and be proud of. Afterall, they are people too and will have to make their own choices.
Not to sound cliche, but it will be okay if you can have faith in you and your children.
BombOctober 2012- OW 11/28/12 -H still denies Separated 11/29/12 Own place 12/12/12 Confessed OW/EA/PA 2/2/13 Oct 2013 - I knew I was done Jan 2014 - Anticipating the rest of my life
