Wife having emotional affair part 2

[3kids]

25years,

Anger= yes I have found a technique that works for me. Also not reacting to everything that happens and thinking before I react.

Chronic stressor= I take the kids when ever she needs me to for school or work. I found the only insurance that would cover our family so she could stay in school(I pay for it). I helped her move into the old house so she would only have to pay utilities for the next six to eight months. I pay over my state allowed child support.

Her school and working= I was working 50 to 60 hours plus taking care of the kids full time. Like single dad full time. So that was a big stressor for both of us.

Stoping complimenting her= she stopped dressing up around me. And sometimes gave me odd looks. But I still do give her compliments as far as the rest of life goes.

Glossing over my stuff= not anymore. I am really working on what I can do to help this relationship.

Nursing plans= Yes they where our way out of financial problems. Let it be known I supported my wife and kids while she wanted to be a stay at home mom up and till 2 to 3 years ago. My income is enough to support a normal family life. We where fine until we had to bail out her mom for committing embezzlement. And we had to refinance our home to do so. I think this is why the wife had to be a superwoman.

Yes I am still her husband. So I will help her no matter what. Just so you know 25years. I am not trying to put her up or down or me at that point. But so you can understand everything. I met my wife when she was 17 and just had a baby with an abusive boyfriend(she was still in high school and this is my adopted oldest). She moved in with me and I supported both of them. I purchased our first house for us. But when her mom and dad got a divorce because of the embezzlement we bought there house. This is when I found an awesome job that pays great and gives me all sorts of flexibility. So I could afford everything with all three kids and new home and she could do what she wanted and be a stay at home mom. But when we had to refinance she was forced to go back to an old job. That is when she decided to become a nurse. And I supported it. When financial issues came up we started to get into credit card debt and that's when it started. We started fighting more and loss of affection came from both of us. It was decided she would work more and I would take care of the kids more. This is when she started to not feel like a mom anymore and I got angry because I felt I was taking care of the family full time with out any help. What I didn't know was how she truly felt. That's when we should have had good communication skills.

How am I demonstrating= first short sale the old house. I made a promise to help her do what ever I could while she went to school. Showing unconditional love. Taking care of the kids and all there expenses. Rearranging my work schedule to help out more.

Job and insurance= November we can reup for health coverage. My company will have insurance in January. If it does not meet my needs, then I will look for a different job.

The dream house= is half the house and half the payment. And yes I in a way did get it after because of her. But it also does help me out money wise. Bankruptcy is all on me. Because she has no credit. So all the cars, credit cards, and loans where under my name. And I just can't afford them.

House= I did offer for her to come home but only if she dropped other man. I offered the old house because she declined me and was thinking about moving in with OM. It is cheaper for her because she only has to pay utilities.


You said I could avoid doing some stuff. What could that be and what could I be doing more of. I did talk to her tonight. I extend and offer to figure out something about the doctors. She is calling me back after I get off work tonight. So we will see what happens.

Thank you 25years this is what I needed!