Starting to hit my " I'm overwhelmed" point. Not even the S/potential D but fallout related to it is much of what is stressing me. D13 has always been a little more on the anxious side but is now having horrible panic attacks and a fear of death and questioning her belief in God and heaven. Much of this is normal adolescent searching but it is compounded by the current situation. I think she is afraid of that feeling of loss- just like our MLCers and us- but at least we are adults. At first she denied it had anything to do with her dad and I but then talking to our neighbor she admitted that was a lot of it, especially since this all happened around her birthday last year and she just had her birthday. ( I hope she doesn't associate those two forever).
I'm trying my best to support and help her and also getting her in with a therapist. H is helping too but it's more from afar and on the phone- either b/c he is traveling or b/c she doesn't want to go to his apt and stay. So I'm feeling the burden of this heavily. Nanny is also going on vacation and I start call for the week on Monday. Have to meet with the tax lawyer tomorrow and a few of the employees at the office are creating major drama. Apparently God is trying to remind me to lean on His strength because mine alone isn't enough for all of this...... My IC says I'm doing pretty well considering. And I learned I've lost 12lbs since my physical last year. Focusing on the positive and what I can control.....
Me 41 H 40 M 20 T 23 S 19,16, 8 D 13 BD1 dec 2012 not sure going to work BD2 sep 2013 seeking a D Filed oct 2013, D Feb 2015 Life is about daring greatly, about being in the arena- Brene Brown
