SO I re-read the TM ... she actually asked What I wanted to DO for my B-day.
I replied honestly ... well mostly ... I told her:
Me:I haven't really given it much thought honestly, I have a ton of work to do. Maybe just Church and S wants to see a movie
W:Ok then I guess I'll let you two have your day (wow bitter much??)
Me:I was not excluding you
W: It sounded like that. If you made plans that's ok
Me: I never meant it that way, S just mentioned he wanted to see a movie is all.... I have not made plans like I said, I haven't given it much thought. I do not want you to feel obligated either
W: I'd like to. No obligation. What would you like to do? Dinner Sat night?
Me: That sounds nice TY
So she then asked where, she has diet restrictions so I told her anywhere that is safe for her would be fine with me, then I discussed how S was scared about me being sick (I have had this migraine and back ached for 10 days ... I can pill it to submission but something just is not right) She offered to go to my appt tomorrow and I thanked her but told her I would be OK.... I realized last week ... alone in the ER just how alone I am, I just have that one little boy .. no family, no one close I would call ... W is the only one I share that kind of stuff with and in a way I was angry, sickness and in health, till death (mine .. lol) do us part ... still mean something to me. I let it go, but it did sting a bit. She TM me back and forth actually concerned .. but like its been said ... I am not sure if its like a friend-zone concerned ... or That's my husband concerned
Either way, she has been nice lately, I can think of all the bad things she has been doing the past few days and if she is telling the truth or not ... but gets me nowhere ... I am detaching again/further from her .... and the B-day is another step .. I have been at this a year now, that rope gets heavy from time to time, then she seems to give me just enough to hold it for a bit longer, it amazes me how in tune she is with me and knows when I am about to drop it every single time.
