I don't believe that you ARE that way. I feel that you ALLOW yourself to be that way...
Saying that you just "are" , allows you to use that excuse anytime you don't want to face yourself....
I agree, I for sure don't want to face myself. ^^^^ Can changing the way I word this stuff on the board, and to myself, really work to change how I think of it? Is that something I can do to stop feeling scared? I need to pay attention to that stuff, huh....
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And before you say "nah. that's not right". You interact HERE, with Men (well T2 jk)and you don't seem to be intimidated any. You interact with Women here as well, and don't seem intimidated.
I can be pretty confident hiding behind typed words.. . It's the in-person thing. I'm trying to pinpoint when this nonsense started. I also think it's situational, but I haven't yet defined the difference. For example, certain environments, I can totally "own it", whether I'm in the company of men or women. Others, I make assumptions and act as if I have no business being seen or heard...that's confusing to me.
Funny, my mother used to tell me that when I was little, I would cry if someone simply looked at me "cross eyed"... I don't yet understand why the face-to-face makes such a difference.
So...are you really disconnected ? I would say I'm "being" disconnected. I'm not making the efforts I used to, and I hold myself back. And I even know it's silly at the time, but I do nothing to change it. It's not working for me....lol.
Or or you just socially awkward ? I may be... I didn't used to think I was.
Introverted personality ?? I doubt that, but lately, on occasion, I do need to be alone.
Extroverted personality ?? That's how I always have been.
Somewhere in the middle ???? Hmmmm....situationally? Is that possible?
And WHAT are you fearing the most, when you are in those situations ???
Judgement ??? Oh, yyyesssss.
WHEN in your life have you allowed judgement to rule your personality ??? That one, I'll need to spend some time journaling. ^^^
WHY did you fear it ???
Social status ??? That's never been me.
Monetary ?? Same, it isn't something that either drives me or holds me back.
Expectations of being successful ?? Maybe a little.
. It's the in-person thing. I'm trying to pinpoint when this nonsense started. I also think it's situational, but I haven't yet defined the difference. For example, certain environments, I can totally "own it", whether I'm in the company of men or women. Others, I make assumptions and act as if I have no business being seen or heard...that's confusing to me. 