Not sure if I had the fear/acceptance one reversed.... I'm still wondering how that works, but I think they often accompany each other....like the chicken and the egg, not sure which came first. Oops.... No. I'm not back spacing and editing because I want you to know I just realized it was fear first. As I typed this.
It wasn't easy.... I've been here a while, lol. I just don't like saying it, typing it, thinking of it. Which is why I need to..... I just didn't want it to still be the way I feel. I thought I addressed this with my IC after my first M. I thought I dealt with it, but obviously not.
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WHY do you feel that way ???
That's the part I don't know. I can't find it. I have no memory of being abused, or neglected.... I just don't know. I'm guessing I stopped right here before, and dismissed it.
Please make a list of 20 good qualities about yourself that you DO KNOW to be true...anything... from you're a great Mom, to you have cute feet...anything at all...
Fear is usually the root, and the root of what you need to work on right now... you got this...
Last edited by TSquared2; 09/16/1407:57 PM.
In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. - Albert Camus
Uncertainty is the very condition which impels people to unfold their powers.-Eric Fromm
I don't want to hijack and wanted to let you know I relate. Yes, i do my fellow nerd in a cheerleader costume. I struggled with "I just want someone to love me." Part of mine stems from wanting to be accepted and feel *regular* or *normal* (whatever that is). Everyone that feels they aren't worthy of love doesn't come from an abusive family.
3 kids BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. ) Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style D final 9-9-14 "Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
That's the part I don't know. I can't find it. I have no memory of being abused, or neglected.... I just don't know. I'm guessing I stopped right here before, and dismissed it.
I don't feel that it always has to be an event. It can come from anywhere at anytime.
Often, it starts as simply a thought in one's head, that maybe they aren't this or that.
Similar to what the MLCer experiences. Often there is a single thought that gets magnified inside of their own noggin...
And they tell two friends, and they tell two friends, and so on and so on....
And there you have the Herbal Essence of dysfunctional thinking....
That lone thought can cause a ripple effect throughout your entire existence. Often, that small thought gets stuck, which crumples your internal belief system, the thought becomes your words, and your words become your actions. Then over the course of time, your actions become behavior patterns.
So maybe this doesn't have anything to do with your past, or maybe it does.
In what areas of your life do you feel this way ??
With love, parenting, friendship, jousting ???
Define WHEN those feelings encompass you, and think about WHY you feel that way, when they happen....
