still holding on - 4

[u-turn]

Had a great conversation with my only confidant last night and it really helps to be able to talk about myself and the situation and justify my actions and decisions to myself. She doesn't offer any advice or judge me, she just listens, and validates (how about that!) I am calm today.

I told her in my inner monologue, I replace the word "doormat" with "devoted husband" and it changes my perspective and gives me strength (read something like that here before) (I wish I could find that gem and others again) I am giving it as much time as I can. She understood that and gave me credit for handling my emotions and really thinking this through.

It is helpful to have a person like that on my side. She wants to see us succeed but doesn't know if she could do the same as I am if she was in this situation. I feel like that is my strength. I hope to be able to keep it up.