WAW still at home, 3 weeks after asking for D

[bdub]

Wet,
No, we drag in the 30 foot long camper with AC, fridge, heat, bunk beds, tvs, the whole sha bang. "glamour camping", or "glamping" some people call it.
I am glad to say that I dealt with it all very well. No anxiety, not fights. I felt good all weekend and kept up my pma and acting as if.
Last night was a backslide though. We were both up stairs and I went down to turn the furnace on for the night. Her phone was there on the table and it buzzed and lit up. The first part of the text scrolled across the top of the screen. " grinning from ear to ear sweetheart". I walked up and told her she had a text and asked who would be grinning from ear to ear sweetheart.
Of course that didnt go well. However, it wasnt a shouting match or even a real tense dissagreement. She 'scolded" me for looking, and I defended myself because it was right there on the table in the dark and lit up. Yes, I looked. I expressed my dissapointment with the fact that she had not stopped it. She said all she ever told me was that she would not physically see him until she moved out. She said it was all texts and a few phone calls. We left it at that.
This morning was awkward but civil.
I have come to the conclusion that our marital money should not be used to fund her fling so I decided to get online and split the phones up so she had her own bill. I snooped some more and was dissapointed to find that it was massive amounts of texts, include while at s10 and s13 games . It was also massive (1500 minutes) amounts of calls. Every day commuting and at every one of s10's practices. I will not speak another word of it, but at least now I have the intel that starsky speaks of. With this new info I will redouble my efforts of DB and continue to 180 what i can. I feel that I have detached WAY more than I thought I had, or was able too. I am not there, but I am making progress.