I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. I was reading through the summary and its exactly the situation that I see my wife in right now. Some random comment (mine was you seem to be distant the last month or two) and then the BD. I tried to have her stay until we could get stuff figured out and she refused and left me, the kids and the house. I think that got her more upset, because she expected me to leave. However, through all of it, you need to do what's the very best thing for your kids. Even if this contradicts what you think the relationship needs. This is so tough for me to do also. Even though you want to be as understanding as possible, when it comes to kids and their needs, he needs to become responsible for his decisions. If he can't afford two houses, it should be his responsibility to figure out what HE can do and not displace your family.
She is acting the same exact way, seems to be unhappy. She tells people she misses her house, the dogs, the normal stuff. She's doing and saying things so others see that she is still unhappy. I think I agree that chasing happiness is a long endeavor.
Its been tough, since looking back there are no answers to why she felt this way (we didn't fight much either.) However, I think that there are some emotional issues that they themselves cannot identify and keep them inside. Then they start resenting others for not seeing them either and/or the other person being happy. At that point, they need to change something and unfortunately it seems to be the marriage. I pray in both of our situations, that they find their way and realize that chasing the next best thing will not ultimately make them happy with themselves. Best of luck to you.
